Since recently discovering that my phone is resistant to water and very loud, I’ve taken to listening to music in the shower. Not owning a purpose-built bathroom audio appliance, the only other option is to open the door through to the kitchen and use that whole room as a sort of giant speaker.

Now, songs are different lengths, and so are showertimes…. so:

• Very short shower (late for work or conserving water): Melt Banana’s cover of Kraftwerk’s ‘Showroom Dummies’
• 3-minute pop shower: erm, McFly?
• Efficient weekday big band shower: ‘Manteca’, as played by the GRP All-Star Big Band
• Scary shower: ‘Shed’, by Meshuggah
• Medium length sophisto-shower: First movement of the Dvorak Cello Concerto
• Latin Jazz shower with an extended live intro: Michel Camilo’s Caribe
• Brilliant shower if you’ve got time: An aged Horowtiz playing Rachmaninoff’s 3rd Concerto
• Normal shower

I’m aware that even by the standards of a blog where the first proper post was a picture of some pasta, this is kind of inane.